Title: Forever Yours, Even In Death
Author: Kyouryoku Senshi
Spoilers: This Is Not Happening
Disclaimer: I don’t own anything!
After her lungs betrayed her, Scully slumped to the floor, hugging herself and the baby to ward off the sudden cold. She was unaware of the approaching footsteps in the distance. Cold tears made their way down her face incessantly. Moments later, she heard a familiar voice call her name from behind her. “Dana?” When she was unresponsive, she felt strong arms pull her into a comforting embrace. They weren’t Mulder’s of course, but close enough to be a consolation. She began to sob as Skinner held her, wrapping his coat around her cold, limp body.
“Oh, Dana,” he whispered. “I’m sorry…I’m so sorry.”
He held her for what seemed like an eternity, crying silent tears of his own. He had promised her that Mulder would be okay, now he instantly regretted it. “I’m sorry, Dana, if only I could have stopped him from going into that forest, then maybe none of this would have happened. It’s my fault,” he whispered. “No, you can’t say that,” she whispered. “You…and Agent Doggett, did all you could…” she finished before closing her eyes. She felt a distant pain low in her abdomen and she placed her hand over her belly before closing her eyes. She just lost Mulder, and now she was going to lose his baby. It was the only piece of him she had left. “No,” she muttered. “My baby,” she closed her eyes and collapsed against Skinner. “Please, don’t take my baby away.” Alarmed, Skinner turned to see Agent Doggett who had just walked into the room.
“Sir? How is she?”
Skinner shook his head as he watched Scully clutch her belly. “Agent Doggett, she needs to be in a hospital, get an ambulance.” -- Several hours later, Scully awoke to find herself inside a hospital. She turned to see Skinner at her side and it was then that the horrible truth sunk in. “No,” she whispered. “Please tell me that it isn’t true.”
Skinner looked down with a sigh, unsure of what to say. Tears welled in her eyes as she let another sob escape. “This is not happening, it can’t be true.”
Skinner moved closer to place his hand on her arm. “Dana,” he whispered.
“What am I doing here?” she almost demanded. “Where is he, I need to see him!”
“No!” He said almost too forcefully. “Dana,” he started more gently. “I’m not sure that is a good idea right now, your baby,”
Then it dawned on her that she had been having subtle abdominal pains. “My baby? What’s wrong with my baby?” she pleaded, her hands covering the small bulge that she had been able to hide so well until now.
“You’re baby is fine, Dana. But all this stress and over exertion triggered the abdominal pains. You need to slow down, take it easy. You still have your baby to think of,” he said gently.
She relaxed and gently caressed her belly. She couldn’t bear it if she had lost her last connection to Mulder.
“You can’t let them do his autopsy,” she started.
Skinner was stunned. “You’re mistaken if you think I’d let you do it in your condition.”
Scully sat up as fast as she could. “You have to; it’s the last thing I can do for him. He’s been through enough!” she yelled.
“Calm down, Dana,” he said gently.
“No, don’t let them cut him open. He’s suffered enough. Please, just let me see him one last time, before the funeral. I need to,” her voice broke. Skinner nodded.
Scully looked away. “He’ll never know about the baby, the miracle he has given me. I was never supposed to conceive,” she whispered.
Skinner watched as another tear fell down her face. Once before, she would have been embarrassed to admit such things to her supervisor, but after all they had been through the last few months, she was glad to have him there for support. “But maybe he does.” Skinner had never been particularly religious, but he wanted to comfort her as much as he could.
Scully smiled sadly. “I know; I saw him.”
He looked at her quizzically. “You saw him?”
She nodded slowly. “Before you found him, I was walking into my motel room. The lights weren’t working and that’s when I saw him. I saw him, transparent, by the window and then he was gone,” her voice broke and more tears came. Skinner looked at her incredulously, but he didn’t doubt her. He just nodded.
“When can I leave?”
Skinner sighed, sitting at her bedside. “The doctors are still running more tests, since you are still early enough in your pregnancy where a miscarriage is possible. They just want to make sure that everything with the baby is fine.”
Scully nodded as another tear slipped down her face. She knew she had overexerted herself last night by running at breaking speed through that forest. She hadn’t been thinking at the time, but she regretted it now, especially since she was still unable to save Mulder.
Sensing her worry, Skinner leaned closer and placed his hand on her shoulder. “Dana, the baby is going to be fine,” and he hoped that this time he was right. Several hours later, Scully was released from the hospital. The doctor had assured her the baby was fine, but she needed to start desk duty as soon as possible, because her pregnancy was at high risk. She had called her mother and she was meeting her at her apartment after she made one last visit to Mulder before his burial. With Skinner and Doggett waiting outside, Scully went inside the morgue. Once the body had been pulled out, the other man had left the room to herself.
Tears filled her eyes as she slowly approached the body on the cold table. She was unable to make it there without bursting into tears at the sight of him. “Oh god, Mulder!” she began to cry.
The scaring on his cheeks reminded her of the awful dream she had of him being tortured the other night. Only now she knew that it wasn’t a dream. If only she could have helped him.
She broke down crying over his body, holding him to her chest. He was cold as ice. “I’m so sorry, Mulder, that they did this to you.”
A moment later, she sniffled and stood up to stare at his pale face. She gently smoothed her hand over the scars, as if she could try to heal them. A tear fell onto his cold, limp body. “I’m really going to miss you, partner, it’s never going to be the same without you,” she started.
She took one of his hands and started to rub warmth into them, before realizing her attempts were futile. “Oh Mulder, there’s something you need to know. I’m pregnant. I’m going to have a baby; your baby.” Tears of both sorrow and joy made their way down her face. She placed his limp hand over her belly and spread his fingers as if he’d be able to feel the child underneath.
“You told me to never give up on a miracle, Mulder. I want so much to share this with you, but I can only hope that you are watching over us. I’ve taken so many risks and have feared many times that I was losing this baby, my last connection to you. From now on, I promise you that I will do my best to be a good mother for our baby. I’m going to tell him or her how amazing their father was to give his life for what he believed in,” she broke into sobs and set his arm back down on the metal table.
“I hope you can hear me somehow, Mulder. I love you so much; I always have and always will.” She placed her head onto his chest and gave into her sobs. She closed her eyes for several moments before opening them. She looked up to see not a limp face, but warm hazel eyes gazing down at her with a smile. She felt a hand caress her stomach. Scully gasped. “Mulder?”
“Don’t think you can get rid of me that easily. I know you’re having our baby and that you’ll make a wonderful mother. I’ll always be watching over you both. I love you.”
Scully blinked and as sudden as the apparition was, it was gone. She couldn’t help but smile. She knew her message had been received.
A/N: R&R Please!!!